August 2016 archive

when God changed my questions about childrearing

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I guess this blog and birthinukraine.wordpress.com are nice (sometimes-not-nice) chronicles of my parenting journey. What a wonderful and deep way to know God, to be tested, to build one’s character, be sanctified by the enjoining work of the Holy Spirit.

The other day, I was writing a bit in Russian for the gals in my church about my parenting journey, and I wanted to record that here.

One of the ways God drastically changed my view of childrearing is found in Philippians 2:13:

For it is God who is working in you, enabling you both to desire and to work out His good purpose.

Starting out, I pretty much knew how to make things a battle of the wills. My will versus my child’s will.

But when I started learning from God, He gave me new questions, particularly about teaching obedience:

  • How can I be ‘on my child’s side’ in the process of teaching him obedience?
  • How can I, through the power of our relationship and intimacy, teach my child to obey, even to make it not that hard to do?

Like God does those things for me….

Asking these questions changed me a lot and changed the way I viewed my children, and the process of teaching them.

How can I constantly have goodwill towards my child, as God does towards me?

What is the big picture of my “good will” for my child in particular areas where I’m asking for compliance? Can I (at some point) explain that fuller picture of the good things I am willing for my child when I am, for example, teaching her not to hit? (Big picture of my good willing: I am willing (desiring) for her to become a good friend and sister who is self-controlled and able to be full of love.)

It’s just all so very fascinating.

Can I, as God’s child, become aware of, explore, and enjoy the greatness of His good will/desires for me as He is teaching me to obey in this area or that? Rather than just focusing on certain motions of obedience (though that is a step)?